My whirl wind trip over the 4th of July passing by so many of the Civil War Battlefields has me think'in bout some of those ol Confederate Recipes, so here is one that I know all you folks will enjoy!
Now Wheat flour was scarce in the South during the Civil War so soldiers baked bread from available ingredients such as white cornmeal. Although this recipe has been changed to include baking powder to make the cornbread fluffier, there was no baking powder available to the Conferderate Soldiers.
CONFEDERATE CORNBREAD
1 Tablespoon Butter
2 Cups White Cornmeal (Not Self Rising)
2 Teaspoons Baking Powder
3/4 Tteaspoon Salt
2 Eggs
2 Cups Fresh Milk
1/4 Cup Oil
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Grease a 9" square baking dish or a deep cast iron skillet with the butter. Combine the cornmeal, baking powder, and salt in a large bowl. In a small bowl whip the eggs with a fork and add milk and oil. Now , stirring only until the dry ingredients are wet, combine the wet ingredients with the dry ingredients. Pour cornbread mixture into the prepared baking dish. Bake 20 - 25 minutes until slightly golden brown on top.
Serve with butter. This is also good crumbled over a bowl of fresh cooked Navy Beans, recipe coming next time!
My Bow and his family likes my Confederate Cornbread served with some of my Jalapeno Preserves which you can purchase by contacting me at LoridaJellyCompany@gmail.com, 1/2 pint jars are $6.00 and pint jars are $10.00 regular shipping rates apply.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Miss Mandy's Homemade Southern Vanilla Extract
This is a recipe that was given to me by my Grandma or "Miss Mandy", as she was affectionately known to everyone in Hart County Georgia. Grandma used to tell me wonderful stories about the Civil War and the Great Depression, as I would sit next to her on the settee.We lost Grandma back in 1964 at the age of 98 and how I would love to talk with her today about the life she lived. So here is Grandma's Vanilla Extract Recipe however, I have substituted Vodka for Shine, unless of course you have a good outlet for some fine Shine.
You will need 6 Vanilla Beans, which can be purchased at most grocery stores these days, 1 Pint Bottle of Vodka or Clear Shine, and several small bottles with screw on lids which you can purchase on line, in craft stores, or at some home goods stores.
MISS MANDY'S HOMEMADE VANILLA EXTRACT
6 Vanilla Beans.
1 Pint Vodka of Clear Shine.
Rub the beans with the dull edge of a knife to evenly distribute the seeds inside the beans, then cut the beans in half lengthwise. Place the beans in the bottle of Vodka or Shine, now you might need to take a little sip or two out of that bottle to have room for the beans. Seal the bottle tightly and set in a cool place for four to six months. You will need to shake the bottle at least once per month, or if you prefer every time that you notice the bottle always works for me. This will help the extract mix and mellow. The once clear Vodka or Shine will turn a nice deep brown. When the extract is ready to use I like to have several small bottles available that I have cleaned and sterilized with screw on lids to fill with the homemade vanilla extract. This also makes great Hostess Gifts, and Christmas Gifts when accompanied by a small gift tag. If you do give these out as Hostess Gifts, please label them as "Miss Mandy's Vanilla Extract", in remembrance of one fine Southern Lady.
I like to make several batches at a time because I keep them on hand as Hostess Gifts.
Enjoy!
You will need 6 Vanilla Beans, which can be purchased at most grocery stores these days, 1 Pint Bottle of Vodka or Clear Shine, and several small bottles with screw on lids which you can purchase on line, in craft stores, or at some home goods stores.
MISS MANDY'S HOMEMADE VANILLA EXTRACT
6 Vanilla Beans.
1 Pint Vodka of Clear Shine.
Rub the beans with the dull edge of a knife to evenly distribute the seeds inside the beans, then cut the beans in half lengthwise. Place the beans in the bottle of Vodka or Shine, now you might need to take a little sip or two out of that bottle to have room for the beans. Seal the bottle tightly and set in a cool place for four to six months. You will need to shake the bottle at least once per month, or if you prefer every time that you notice the bottle always works for me. This will help the extract mix and mellow. The once clear Vodka or Shine will turn a nice deep brown. When the extract is ready to use I like to have several small bottles available that I have cleaned and sterilized with screw on lids to fill with the homemade vanilla extract. This also makes great Hostess Gifts, and Christmas Gifts when accompanied by a small gift tag. If you do give these out as Hostess Gifts, please label them as "Miss Mandy's Vanilla Extract", in remembrance of one fine Southern Lady.
I like to make several batches at a time because I keep them on hand as Hostess Gifts.
Enjoy!
Buttermilk Cake with Fresh Peaches and Cream
This is an old Southern favorite which I believe you will enjoy. You may substitute fresh strawberries for the peaches however in the South we always take advantage of what crops are currently in season and Sweet Georgia Peaches are currently abundant. I love to serve this cake for dessert for Sunday Dinner along with my Fried Chicken, Mashed Ppotatoes, Gravy and Creamed Sweet Peas. Now for all you city gals and guys out there and for some of you Northern folks this is what we call down South "From Scratch Recipe", which basically means there is no store brought cake mix here and we do not skimp on the ingredients.
You will need a 10" tube cake pan, a flour sifter, a spatula, extra butter and flour to grease and flour cake pan, and yes you may use your electric mixer. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
BUTTERMILK CAKE
1 cup butter softened.
2 cups sugar.
4 eggs, yolks and whites divided (in a separate bowl beat egg whites till stiff, set aside).
1/2 teaspoon baking soda.
1 cup buttermilk.
3 cups flour.
1/8 teaspoon salt.
3 tablespoons vanilla (not the imitation kind, this is a Southern recipe after all)
Mix softened butter and sugar well. Then add egg yolks. You will need to shift your flour, baking soda, and salt together. Now alternate adding the flour mixture and buttermilk into the butter/sugar mixture. Mix well and add vanilla. Gently fold in egg whites using a spatula and gently mix well. Bake in a 10" tube pan that has been greased and floured at 350 degrees for 1 hour and 5 minutes. Let cake cool in pan then place on a cake plate.
In a bowl slice up as many ripe sweet peaches as you have guests, set aside. In a separate bowl mix 1/2 pint of whole cream with 1 teaspoon vanilla till stiff.
Place the cake on the table along with the fresh sliced sweet peaches and the bowl of fresh whipped cream. Slice the cake for your guests and allow them to add the peaches and cream to their liken.
Enjoy!
You will need a 10" tube cake pan, a flour sifter, a spatula, extra butter and flour to grease and flour cake pan, and yes you may use your electric mixer. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
BUTTERMILK CAKE
1 cup butter softened.
2 cups sugar.
4 eggs, yolks and whites divided (in a separate bowl beat egg whites till stiff, set aside).
1/2 teaspoon baking soda.
1 cup buttermilk.
3 cups flour.
1/8 teaspoon salt.
3 tablespoons vanilla (not the imitation kind, this is a Southern recipe after all)
Mix softened butter and sugar well. Then add egg yolks. You will need to shift your flour, baking soda, and salt together. Now alternate adding the flour mixture and buttermilk into the butter/sugar mixture. Mix well and add vanilla. Gently fold in egg whites using a spatula and gently mix well. Bake in a 10" tube pan that has been greased and floured at 350 degrees for 1 hour and 5 minutes. Let cake cool in pan then place on a cake plate.
In a bowl slice up as many ripe sweet peaches as you have guests, set aside. In a separate bowl mix 1/2 pint of whole cream with 1 teaspoon vanilla till stiff.
Place the cake on the table along with the fresh sliced sweet peaches and the bowl of fresh whipped cream. Slice the cake for your guests and allow them to add the peaches and cream to their liken.
Enjoy!
Saturday, July 16, 2011
4th of July Holiday Road Trip
This story can only begin where all stories begin, so please bare with me. Just as I was looking forward to leaving work and to a long and leisurely 4th of July Holiday at home the call comes in, "Babe, when will you be home? Hurry up we are driving to York, PA as soon as you get here!" Of course being the dutiful and gracious Southern Belle that I naturally am, I accept my Bow's invitation of sorts showing all the enthusiasm that I can muster at the time. Goodbye four glorious days of doing absolutely nothing but relaxing!
Now you must understand that the term leaving as soon as I get home actually requires the following,me arriving at home and packing clothes for both of us, shoes, hair products, makeup, etc..etc..In addition leaving for a 4 day trip with a very loving 65lb lapdog (Sunflower) is just not a simple task as it involves a dog bath, packing her food (special diet), treats, Condo (yes, she has a Condo a very large pen that folds down flat). Naturally the packing is done by myself as my Bow has vanished not to be seen until we are loaded and ready to go.
Off we go to York, PA! It is around 8:30 pm on Thursday night and we are headed to York, PA with our dog Sunflower, in a truck hauling a car hauler in order to drop off a generator and pick up a car for a friend. Our route is I-95 North. Of course when you live in Lorida, Florida there is actually no direct route to I-95, so off we head South, yes even though I am a natural blonde I do know that York, PA is North of Florida! Our first stop is Okeechobee, Florida where one of the largest Seminole War battles took place, by the way the Seminole Indians are the only tribe that have never signed a treaty agreement with the United States. Now from Okeechobee we can actually begin to head North on 441 to 60 East and finally to I-95 North.
As we happily travel North on I-95 watching the extremely boring scenery, and yes part of the Florida landscape is boring, and watching cars headed South I ask my Bow where and what time he planned to stop for the night. "I haven't thought about it yet, I'll drive for awhile and see", this should have been my first clue. It is about 11:00pm and I have been up since 4:00am a total of 19 hours and counting...once again I inquire around the Daytona, Florida exit when and where did he plan to stop. "I will find a place up the road, I want to drive for awhile", on that note I fell asleep. I woke up again near the exits for Savannah, Georgia (which I highly suggest that everyone visits at least once in their lifetime) and that is when I discovered that his intent was to drive straight through to York, PA, it is official I am traveling with a crazy man! So it is back to sleep for me in the front of a truck...oh the Joy and comfort, I am so grateful that I remembered to bring my goose down feather pillows!
Ahhh Morning! After such a good night sleep I woke up somewhere on I-95 in South Carolina with a kink in my neck and swollen ankles, and yes the crazy man is still driving. Breakfast time which on the road means a fast stop at a McDonalds, I should say a stop at a McDonalds, after all we are in the heart of the South and absolutely and I do mean absolutely nothing is fast here including fast food. Thirty minutes later we are handed our breakfast in bags, the dog has been walked and watered and off we head North again on I-95. Now I must say that the scenery has improved and I do so love the Carolina's, I spent a large portion of my childhood in North Georgia and the Carolina's. This area is always pretty to the eye in any season.
In almost no time at all we are through the Carolina's, Virginia and are in Washington DC. Now I must say that being in Washington DC and crossing the Potomac on the 4th of July weekend is somewhat emotional when you think about everything our Country has been through.We travel on past the Washington Monument, the Pentagon, and the Capitol and they are truly breathtaking buildings.
As we travel along on I-95 North we drop straight down into downtown Washington DC on a Friday and on the 4th of July Holiday, please trust me this is not where you want to be unless you plan to stop and do some sightseeing! I highly suggest you take the bypass, which is what I believe I suggested to my dear crazy man. Approximately 10 miles and an hour and a half later we are headed to Maryland and somehow someway we manage to take the wrong turn on the George Washington Pike, we crossed the Potomac three more times until we finally got our directions correct. I also highly suggest you travel along the George Washington Pike at least once as it is absolutely beautiful and I discovered that is where the FBI Headquarters is located as well as the National Police Department.
Finally we arrive in York, PA around 6:00pm on Friday and we get the last motel room within 100 miles as there seems to be a regional children's soccer tournament taking place as well as the reenactment at Gettysburg, PA. The room was wonderful with a large jacuzzi right next to the kingsize bed and being the Southern Queen that I am I was in the jacuzzi within five minutes awwww this is good... the road trip is just melting away.
York, PA is a pretty area which I have had the opportunity to previously visit with the Harley Owner's Group and have toured the Harley Davidson Factory which is quite amazing, but that was another lifetime and another story. After breakfast at the hotel we head out to complete our mission. We deliver the generator and discover that the car is too heavy for the truck to pull as the truck has been lowered. So we now load up a larger generator and a tiller. We are back on the road by 10:30am, now let's look at that map and find an alternate route back!
It is Saturday morning and we decided to head towards Gettysburg, PA and I am very excited being a Southern Belle, I am natyrally fascinated by the history of the Civil War, or as I refer to it the Northern Aggression. Our travels takes us through Abbottstown, PA which is beautiful with buildings dating back to the 1,700's and which we have both decided that we will visit again.
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Leaving Gettysburg, PA we traveled along 80 and then turn onto 220 South through the Appalachians and Shenandoah Valley which was beautiful with light summer rains and no traffic so I would suggest this route for anyone traveling! My partner has finally regained his lost sanity and once again we stop for the night just South of Greenville, South Carolina.
Sunday morning and after a good nights sleep we are on the road once again headed for yes...I-95 South Florida and home. We travel once again on the road we originally headed North on, passing through South Carolina, Georgia, onto Florida through Jacksonville and on to Melbourne to 60 West and onto 441 South back to Okeechobee and finally home to Lorida around 8:00pm. It was a whirl wind trip and inspite of driving straight through from Florida to York, PA I would not have missed a single moment. We laughed, talked, dreamed, played with Sunflower who was a real trooper and never a problem, and we saw some wonderful sights that you can only see on a road trip in America.
Happy 4th of July America!
Now just a little more rest and I will be ready to go back to work on Tuesday...maybe.
Now you must understand that the term leaving as soon as I get home actually requires the following,me arriving at home and packing clothes for both of us, shoes, hair products, makeup, etc..etc..In addition leaving for a 4 day trip with a very loving 65lb lapdog (Sunflower) is just not a simple task as it involves a dog bath, packing her food (special diet), treats, Condo (yes, she has a Condo a very large pen that folds down flat). Naturally the packing is done by myself as my Bow has vanished not to be seen until we are loaded and ready to go.
Off we go to York, PA! It is around 8:30 pm on Thursday night and we are headed to York, PA with our dog Sunflower, in a truck hauling a car hauler in order to drop off a generator and pick up a car for a friend. Our route is I-95 North. Of course when you live in Lorida, Florida there is actually no direct route to I-95, so off we head South, yes even though I am a natural blonde I do know that York, PA is North of Florida! Our first stop is Okeechobee, Florida where one of the largest Seminole War battles took place, by the way the Seminole Indians are the only tribe that have never signed a treaty agreement with the United States. Now from Okeechobee we can actually begin to head North on 441 to 60 East and finally to I-95 North.
As we happily travel North on I-95 watching the extremely boring scenery, and yes part of the Florida landscape is boring, and watching cars headed South I ask my Bow where and what time he planned to stop for the night. "I haven't thought about it yet, I'll drive for awhile and see", this should have been my first clue. It is about 11:00pm and I have been up since 4:00am a total of 19 hours and counting...once again I inquire around the Daytona, Florida exit when and where did he plan to stop. "I will find a place up the road, I want to drive for awhile", on that note I fell asleep. I woke up again near the exits for Savannah, Georgia (which I highly suggest that everyone visits at least once in their lifetime) and that is when I discovered that his intent was to drive straight through to York, PA, it is official I am traveling with a crazy man! So it is back to sleep for me in the front of a truck...oh the Joy and comfort, I am so grateful that I remembered to bring my goose down feather pillows!
Ahhh Morning! After such a good night sleep I woke up somewhere on I-95 in South Carolina with a kink in my neck and swollen ankles, and yes the crazy man is still driving. Breakfast time which on the road means a fast stop at a McDonalds, I should say a stop at a McDonalds, after all we are in the heart of the South and absolutely and I do mean absolutely nothing is fast here including fast food. Thirty minutes later we are handed our breakfast in bags, the dog has been walked and watered and off we head North again on I-95. Now I must say that the scenery has improved and I do so love the Carolina's, I spent a large portion of my childhood in North Georgia and the Carolina's. This area is always pretty to the eye in any season.
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| Traveling I-95 Washington DC |
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| Traveling I-95 Washington DC |
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| The Pentagon Building |
Finally we arrive in York, PA around 6:00pm on Friday and we get the last motel room within 100 miles as there seems to be a regional children's soccer tournament taking place as well as the reenactment at Gettysburg, PA. The room was wonderful with a large jacuzzi right next to the kingsize bed and being the Southern Queen that I am I was in the jacuzzi within five minutes awwww this is good... the road trip is just melting away.
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| York, PA |
York, PA is a pretty area which I have had the opportunity to previously visit with the Harley Owner's Group and have toured the Harley Davidson Factory which is quite amazing, but that was another lifetime and another story. After breakfast at the hotel we head out to complete our mission. We deliver the generator and discover that the car is too heavy for the truck to pull as the truck has been lowered. So we now load up a larger generator and a tiller. We are back on the road by 10:30am, now let's look at that map and find an alternate route back!
It is Saturday morning and we decided to head towards Gettysburg, PA and I am very excited being a Southern Belle, I am natyrally fascinated by the history of the Civil War, or as I refer to it the Northern Aggression. Our travels takes us through Abbottstown, PA which is beautiful with buildings dating back to the 1,700's and which we have both decided that we will visit again.
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| Abottstown Circle |
Our next stop is Mister Ed's Elephant Museum which is basically a candy store with the largest collection of Elephants that I have ever seen. It is a great stop just to stretch your legs and get some old fashioned candy we could not say no to the Squirrel Nuts, Mary Jane's, and Bit of Honey. Onward we travel to Gettysburg, PA. which I must say is one of the highlights of our road trip and I cannot wait to return and to spend more time just walking through the battlefields. I wish we had time to stay and watch the reenactment and spend a few days here, we will be back here on our next vacation!
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| Walls & Monuments at Gettysburg |
Cannon at Gettysburg
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| Ghost in Photo at Gettysburg, PA |
Leaving Gettysburg, PA we traveled along 80 and then turn onto 220 South through the Appalachians and Shenandoah Valley which was beautiful with light summer rains and no traffic so I would suggest this route for anyone traveling! My partner has finally regained his lost sanity and once again we stop for the night just South of Greenville, South Carolina.
Sunday morning and after a good nights sleep we are on the road once again headed for yes...I-95 South Florida and home. We travel once again on the road we originally headed North on, passing through South Carolina, Georgia, onto Florida through Jacksonville and on to Melbourne to 60 West and onto 441 South back to Okeechobee and finally home to Lorida around 8:00pm. It was a whirl wind trip and inspite of driving straight through from Florida to York, PA I would not have missed a single moment. We laughed, talked, dreamed, played with Sunflower who was a real trooper and never a problem, and we saw some wonderful sights that you can only see on a road trip in America.
Happy 4th of July America!
Now just a little more rest and I will be ready to go back to work on Tuesday...maybe.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Melinda Lou, that can't be you in that coffin?
Now Girls and Guys, I know we all want to look our best and I personally totally intend on leaving a good looking corpse, despite my age, when I depart from this earth. Why I would not even think of leaving my house without my hair done and my proper face on, (that is properly applied makeup for you Northern Girls). However, I do not believe that having a gallon of heavy cake makeup and a bucket of rouge applied to my face with a hairdo that I have never worn in my entire life, and an outfit that I absolutely would not be caught dead in is a proper look for my final appearance on this earth. Where do the Funeral Parlors find these make-up artists? Why my friend is already roll'in over in their grave and they hav'nt even made it there yet!
I am pleading with each and every living soul , especially all my fellow Southern Belle gal pals, to sit down right now and take the time to write a Living Will and a Final Request as to exactly what you would like to have done with your earthly remains, which I am sure is not looking like a clown in the local circus, unless of course you are a clown in the circus. I would suggest that at least every five years you have a good professional portrait done and keep a copy of it with your Living Will and Final Request, as it is becoming quite obvious that we cannot count on or trust our own family members to properly remember what we looked liked long enough to get us in the grave after we have passed through this life. Hopefully someone will pass the photo along to the Funeral Parlor Director and their make-up artist. May I also suggest that you purchase an outfit that you absolutely love, place it in a garment bag and label it " to be worn at my final appearance (funeral)", because your loved ones are liable to have you dressed in a bright purple, red and green flowered chiffon nightmare. You may also want to make a final request of your hair stylist and find a good make-up artist! Guys, this is also for you because no self respecting Cowboy wants to be dressed up in a baby blue suit, and no Southern Gentleman wants to be laid out in jeans and an old tee shirt, even if it was his favorite one!
Please friends and neighbors let's all do our best to leave a good looking corpse with proper makeup, hair, and hopefully wearing a proper outfit that we absolutely love so hopefully your friends and family will actually be able to recognise us as we lay in our coffins, and yes we will all be in one sometime in the future. Dear family members of loved ones, Please look twice and sincerely ask yourself, " is that what Aunt Bea, really looked like and would she really have picked out this bright purple, red, and green chiffon dress" ?
May I also speak directly on the concerns and issues of attending a funeral in proper attire. Being brought up in the South I was naturally instructed on the proper attire to wear to a funeral, which is certainly not a skin tight red dress that sits just below my derriere and barley covers my breasts. And, yes I recently saw a young lady attend a family members funeral in this type of attire. Why I swear she looked just like she was auditioning for a strip club instead of attending a funeral! A proper dress or suit for a lady to wear to a funeral is one that falls at or below the knee and is of a dark color that actually covers your body. For gentleman proper attire would be a suit or slacks with a sport jacket, not dirty jeans and a ragged tee shirt. Who are you showing your respect to, the person on the street corner or your friend or loved one in the coffin?
As for me, I am off to have a portrait done then off to Nieman Marcus for an outfit that I will absolutely fall in love with. Now where did I place that paper and ink pen to write that Living Will and Final Request?
Melinda Lou, now honey try not to roll over too much in your grave why you just might rip that new lovely bright orange and red rayon dress that your family bought for you and mess up that helmet hairdo. I'll be see'in you.
Monday, June 27, 2011
Antebelium Rules for the Southern Belle
It can be said that from a social point of view that the evry idea of a "Southern Belle", is an elitist title that was invented by wealthy plantation owners. Why the title itself has the very connotations of arrogance and self-importance. Yes, there is an air of arrogance and self importance to a degree in all Southern Belles or Southern Ladies, including myself.
There are many of what I refer to as "Antebelium Rules for the Southern Belle", and though sadly it is true that the tru Southern Belle has ceased to exist in today's society, there still lives a Southern Belle in all women that are born and raised in the South. The following are a few "Rules" that the proper Modern Southern Belle still abides by.
1. Never wear white shoes before Easter or after Labor Day, except of course as a bride.
2. "Thank You Notes", are a necessary component of being gracious and appreciative.
3. Never chew gum or smoke in the streets.
4. Never show anger in public, smile and act like a lady.
5. Act helpless and confused only when it is to your advantage; never let a man know just how clever and
capable you really are.
6. Be elegant and graceful.
7. When all else fails, Charm, Charm, Charm.
8. Always be careful who you talk about. Everybody in the South is kin to someone. No matter who you
bring up in conversation, you're bound to be insulting someones Aunt, Uncle, or third cousin twice
removed.
9. "Tacky", a term used by southern women to describe someone's behavior or appearance. Always dress
appropriatly and act like the lady that you were raised to be.
10. Smile politely and excuse the behavior of Yankees, after all they simply do not know any better.
11. Never, never under any circumstances call a man, trust me they will call you.
There are many of what I refer to as "Antebelium Rules for the Southern Belle", and though sadly it is true that the tru Southern Belle has ceased to exist in today's society, there still lives a Southern Belle in all women that are born and raised in the South. The following are a few "Rules" that the proper Modern Southern Belle still abides by.
1. Never wear white shoes before Easter or after Labor Day, except of course as a bride.
2. "Thank You Notes", are a necessary component of being gracious and appreciative.
3. Never chew gum or smoke in the streets.
4. Never show anger in public, smile and act like a lady.
5. Act helpless and confused only when it is to your advantage; never let a man know just how clever and
capable you really are.
6. Be elegant and graceful.
7. When all else fails, Charm, Charm, Charm.
8. Always be careful who you talk about. Everybody in the South is kin to someone. No matter who you
bring up in conversation, you're bound to be insulting someones Aunt, Uncle, or third cousin twice
removed.
9. "Tacky", a term used by southern women to describe someone's behavior or appearance. Always dress
appropriatly and act like the lady that you were raised to be.
10. Smile politely and excuse the behavior of Yankees, after all they simply do not know any better.
11. Never, never under any circumstances call a man, trust me they will call you.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
We Be's A Goings Fishin!
Now there's no better sounds thans for a real southern county gal to hears the words "We Be's A Going Fish'in", but nots ats no 3:30 in the dang mornin! It's still as dark as a night sky can be out here in the country as we are a pull'in up to the boat ramp at Trails End Fishing Resort right here on Lake Istokpoga to unload the boat into the water on the canal. It sure was a long ride round to Trails End why it darn near took us a whole 5 minutes to gets over here. I sures is glad I's has my coffee with me.
Now it's be about 4:00 am here and the dang birds arn't even up out of the nests yet, much less that ol' sun a raisen outta that there East sky. What the ?%!#$&* am I a doing up at this time of the cotton pickin morning to go a fish'in? Why everyone knows that there ain't no respectable Large Mouth Bass gonna lets itself be caught afore daylight hours. What's that you be a sayin Mister Man? We gottas get to the right fish'in spot afore anybody else? It be's a 27,000 acre lake, doin ya really think some folks gonna be right there in da spot that ya'll done be thinkin bout? If'n ya'll haven't noticed there ain't no souls up on this here lake at this time of mornin but for us. Why's even the fish camp is still as quite as a country mouse in church on Sunday.
Now's ya'll gots to keeps in minds that whiles I tells ya'll mys story that my mans one of them theres professional fishing mans, why he be's the one and only Mark Beaver of Mark Beaver's Guide Service. So off'in we go racing out to that there secret spot on da lake, now bein the only boat on da lake this a mornin ya'll dones know we's gotta hurry. We's gets to that there secret spot rights in da middle of this here lake and it's still as dark as its cans be. I looks round ands I can sees a few lights a turning on in some of them theres cabins along da shore of the lake. I's is sure mighty glads I's has my coffee with me and one of them there thermos bottles for a back em up.
I settles on down into my fishin chair in da back of da boat of course whys do ya'll think any self respecting fisherman gonna gives up the front of da boat, nots even for his own lady! So's I gets my bait on my own hook and I's starts a fishin with my favorite carrot stick. Now for ya'll new fishermen and nons fishermen a carrot stick ain't be something ya'll eat. A carrot stick its be a new fancy fishin stick made from real carrot fibers and its be's a real pretty bright orange kinda like Gator orange for all ya'll Florida Gator fans, and this here thing it must not even weighs 3 pounds.
Wells after bout an hour here comes that ol sun right ups there in the East just likes its a pose to. And wouldn't cha all know them there Large Mouth Bass they a go to biting. Me and my man done caught us several 2 to 3 pound lil ol' bucks in a matter of no times at all. Looks likes da fishins gonna be's good todays.
Would'nt cha all knows it thats just bout nows I's is a wishin that I's hadn't hads all that there coffee this a mornin. I's gotta go Pee! You's sees my man he cans just go aheads and goes pee when he needs to out here on this dang lake, but all of you there gals done knows that it aint that easy forin us to be a goin pee whens we needs to. So heres be's my choices, there be's a bucket that I can sits on, but thats be kinda hard to do with the waves thats be a hittin da boat this mornin. Why's I'd probably fall rights off that there bucket with this here boat a rockin back and forth. So herin be's my only other choice is to sits on the sides of da boat and hold onto them there rails cause I done knows we's ain't a headin back to no fishin camp when da fish be's a biten out heres on this lake and I's jest cant's pees my britches. Yes sirre, I dones chose the only choice I thinks I has so I's puts my fishin stick down and sits on the sides of da boat and holds onto them there rails. Now jest bout the time that I can say ahhh, I's hears my reel and I's has got me a big ol fish a pullin line. So's I goes to a thinkin that I's can sits here and finish my business or I's cans catch that there fish. Wells its jest bout that time my fishin stick is headed towards the rail of da cotton picken boat and I's was not bout to loss my's carrot stick. I's jumps ups, my britches falls downs to my's ankles but I catches me that there Big Mouth Bass. Now'in I's takes a looks round after I caughts that there fish and I's knows that my face be's as red as my mans winter long johns and I's was be'ins so thankfuls that there still was not no other cotton pickin boats on this here lake. I's also be very thankful thats my man used him some better judgement and didn't goes a shootin any photos with my britches clear done to my ankles while I was a catchin that there bass.
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Nows wheres did I's put that there toilet paper?
Now it's be about 4:00 am here and the dang birds arn't even up out of the nests yet, much less that ol' sun a raisen outta that there East sky. What the ?%!#$&* am I a doing up at this time of the cotton pickin morning to go a fish'in? Why everyone knows that there ain't no respectable Large Mouth Bass gonna lets itself be caught afore daylight hours. What's that you be a sayin Mister Man? We gottas get to the right fish'in spot afore anybody else? It be's a 27,000 acre lake, doin ya really think some folks gonna be right there in da spot that ya'll done be thinkin bout? If'n ya'll haven't noticed there ain't no souls up on this here lake at this time of mornin but for us. Why's even the fish camp is still as quite as a country mouse in church on Sunday.
Now's ya'll gots to keeps in minds that whiles I tells ya'll mys story that my mans one of them theres professional fishing mans, why he be's the one and only Mark Beaver of Mark Beaver's Guide Service. So off'in we go racing out to that there secret spot on da lake, now bein the only boat on da lake this a mornin ya'll dones know we's gotta hurry. We's gets to that there secret spot rights in da middle of this here lake and it's still as dark as its cans be. I looks round ands I can sees a few lights a turning on in some of them theres cabins along da shore of the lake. I's is sure mighty glads I's has my coffee with me and one of them there thermos bottles for a back em up.
I settles on down into my fishin chair in da back of da boat of course whys do ya'll think any self respecting fisherman gonna gives up the front of da boat, nots even for his own lady! So's I gets my bait on my own hook and I's starts a fishin with my favorite carrot stick. Now for ya'll new fishermen and nons fishermen a carrot stick ain't be something ya'll eat. A carrot stick its be a new fancy fishin stick made from real carrot fibers and its be's a real pretty bright orange kinda like Gator orange for all ya'll Florida Gator fans, and this here thing it must not even weighs 3 pounds.
Wells after bout an hour here comes that ol sun right ups there in the East just likes its a pose to. And wouldn't cha all know them there Large Mouth Bass they a go to biting. Me and my man done caught us several 2 to 3 pound lil ol' bucks in a matter of no times at all. Looks likes da fishins gonna be's good todays.
Would'nt cha all knows it thats just bout nows I's is a wishin that I's hadn't hads all that there coffee this a mornin. I's gotta go Pee! You's sees my man he cans just go aheads and goes pee when he needs to out here on this dang lake, but all of you there gals done knows that it aint that easy forin us to be a goin pee whens we needs to. So heres be's my choices, there be's a bucket that I can sits on, but thats be kinda hard to do with the waves thats be a hittin da boat this mornin. Why's I'd probably fall rights off that there bucket with this here boat a rockin back and forth. So herin be's my only other choice is to sits on the sides of da boat and hold onto them there rails cause I done knows we's ain't a headin back to no fishin camp when da fish be's a biten out heres on this lake and I's jest cant's pees my britches. Yes sirre, I dones chose the only choice I thinks I has so I's puts my fishin stick down and sits on the sides of da boat and holds onto them there rails. Now jest bout the time that I can say ahhh, I's hears my reel and I's has got me a big ol fish a pullin line. So's I goes to a thinkin that I's can sits here and finish my business or I's cans catch that there fish. Wells its jest bout that time my fishin stick is headed towards the rail of da cotton picken boat and I's was not bout to loss my's carrot stick. I's jumps ups, my britches falls downs to my's ankles but I catches me that there Big Mouth Bass. Now'in I's takes a looks round after I caughts that there fish and I's knows that my face be's as red as my mans winter long johns and I's was be'ins so thankfuls that there still was not no other cotton pickin boats on this here lake. I's also be very thankful thats my man used him some better judgement and didn't goes a shootin any photos with my britches clear done to my ankles while I was a catchin that there bass.
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